Introductions and life experience

Hi! I'm Me. Two years ago I had given up on myself. After my dad lost the battle to leukemia I was completely destroyed. 

The battle against cancer was fierce and my mum and I like to think myself made sure my dad wasn't alone on the battlefield. We actually won the first battle, he was able to go back home, eat all he wanted and live a normal life (I won't lie, the process was very hard on all of us but worth it every sweat drop of it). A few months later we lost the war and we lost me.

Besides for the fact of losing him which was obviously devastating I also made a new acquaintance, the postwar syndrome also known as depression. It took me way too long to ask for help but I'm glad I did, but I'm not glad I rushed into stopping the treatment because I realize now I wasn't ready. 

My doctors said it was a very common reaction. I wasn't comforted by that, actually nothing brought me comfort these days. When my dad went back to the hospital I remember going there at my lunch break to spend it with him. I spent most of my weekends with him. When he said goodbye I didn't know what to do at lunch or on weekends. 

It's so ironic. No one wants to live like that, but once you do you rather live it like that than go home without him. I miss him every day. I think about him so much. And the funny thing about it is we weren't that close before he got sick.

I struggle every day to be positive and overcome depression because the horrible thing about it is it never goes away. So I guess I keep fitting, it's just a different battlefield.

This blog is intended to by a safe place to people who can relate to my story. It could be a place to share our pain, our fears...but above all our victories. Because the war I lost that was enough losing for a lifetime. 

Care to join me?